A couple of things I'd like to purchase

There are some gadgets I'd like to purchase. Here are two.

First, I'd like to purchase a mind-reader. I don't want to know what people are thinking every minute because I think that would eventually be like Twilight Zone--so much more than you bargained for--but I'd like the capability to tune in as needed and read minds when people are particularly vague, cryptic, or elusive, when I need them to be specific, open and direct. Get everything clarified to my satisfaction, and then tune out again. Lately, I've been particularly in need of a mind-reader. However, I would need one with a negativity filter. Are there bad thoughts about me? Sorry, no-can-read. I need "just the facts, Ma'am."

Another gadget that I'd like is the invisibility cloak. I wouldn't care to spy on people, unless my mind-reader was out of service, but I would like the cloak so that I can be, at times, unavailable. Phone rings? Oops, Mom isn't here. Dinner to cook? Oops, can't find Mom. The dog has an accident on the front carpet? Oops, can't find Mom. Church gets boring? I drift right down the aisle and out into the hall. But then again, who ever heard of church getting boring? That is too far fetched. It would also be great to be invisible when you're late for something or when you need to see and not be seen.

It would also be great to use the invisibility cloak in concert with the ability to levitate. Put on the cloak and levitate while you wait for the bus, or wait for something or someone. Once again, while you're at church, you could levitate invisibly and perhaps even get a little sleep. When you stand in line, you could be standing up but levitate enough to take the weight off your feet. This would have been particularly helpful when I had the terrible problems with my feet, which is probably when this whole notion of levitation first formed in my mind. But it is not enough to levitate, if you levitate in a horizontal way, because that would be embarrassing, particularly in a Sunday dress (although the gal in the picture, above, is pulling it off). You also need to be invisible when you levitate in public--hence the need for the invisibility cloak.

I guess I'll start saving my pennies.